A Reminder for Personal Passion

Hello dear readers!

Today I have something quite awesome I want to share with you, namely an amazing concert experience acting as a wakeup call. 

So! I went to an Apocalyptica concert (playing their Metallica cello renditions) and honestly not expecting too much. When I had listened to them through Spotify, I liked the music but wasn’t hyped per sé. Live, oh man. It was so different. Firstly the amount of PEOPLE there was surprising. The line, moving fast, was very long. And it looked like a full house.

Even though I was a bit off to the side, I still took a front row seat because I am a front row person by nature, ever since I finally got the opportunity to attend concerts at 19. 

So the concert started, everyone seated and the first half was more symphonic. Frankly, it was breathtaking. The soul, the passion, the elevating energy! God, I felt I’d draw them a million portraits to give back a semblance what they give to me. The energetic exchange I felt took me back to the time I was performing with a drum orchestra at 15. The symbiosis on stage, once I felt it, I was ruined to yearn back to it. Brazilian music isn’t exactly my forte so after a few years I left the group in good spirits and with some useful technical skills. I’ve gone to a studio to learn via online lessons to a full drum kit. 

There has been a year pause in that, but every time I experience a concert with such pure energetic elevation I get struck by an urgency of why are you not drumming? Why do you reject the passion that makes you feel more alive than anything else. It’s right here. That is what I felt yesterday as well. There is another Saga with a band that has fulfilled my childhood dreams and given me so much I am still moved. But that Saga is a story for another day because it is long. 

So what did I do with this urge now? I try to accept I can’t choose one or the other, both art and music are my passions, just with a different nuance. I also seek to finally buy an electric drum kit since I am moving out in 4 week’s time. 

My partner was strangely neutral on it until I finally wrung out the reason from him. He thought using that money for dental is a more urgent investment. At first I was bummed out, seriously bummed out and said I’ll leave the kit then because he has a point. It is more rational. I am fairly impulse-driven and he grounds me well when I get too haphazard. 

I turned the thought over, because the urge was(and is) still burning within to return to drumming. I proposed a compromise of taking the kit payment over half a year and that way I can afford dental each month as well. The jury approved and thus I shall let the plan commence! 

Back to the concert, there was an intermission after the amazing and honestly ethereal symphonic part. Even during that time I was cheering loudly with an applause between tracks, receiving fair smiles from one member. Those interactions are small, but energetically they are so much.

When the second part began, they called the crowd in front of the stage to stand, I of course managed to get in front and it was hilarious how alarmed the guards were at this notion, given there wasn’t really a barrier between the stage. But everyone behaved and kept the requested distance. And then began the heavy part, giving me a chance to headbang as much as I wanted, ending it with Nothing Else Matters. The crowd sung along, phones were up instead of lighters (I am so glad that tradition has carried over despite the advancement of technology).  The energy of it. That symbiosis. I couldn’t ask for anything more from them even if I wanted.

So I’ve come away gratefully with a re-lit passion that strums in my veins ever since I first hit the stage as a teen. One day, perhaps, I can give people similar energetic value. It is what I hope for the most if I ever hit the stage again. All my personal and biggest examples I look up to are self-taught and started later than me, it is not too late!

Have a wonderful day!



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